Little Things

Why is happiness so damn hard to find?

I mean, we're all looking for it aren't we? So why aren't more people, you know, happy?

I have a few theories on the matter.

For instance, I think happiness is an inner state of being, not something to be found in the external world.

You won't find it in the trunk of your new car. It isn't sitting at the swim-up bar at your all-inclusive resort.

And no, it isn't stashed in the attic of your dream house, either.

Happiness resides in your perspective, in how you look at things rather than in things themselves.

You can keep hustling, saving money, working hard, and looking to the future for relief, but when that relief finally comes it'll be fleeting at best. And when it's gone, you'll find yourself back on the hedonic treadmill.

You've always been the source of your own happiness. External things might amplify or dampen the happiness that already exists inside you but they can't conjure happiness out of thin air.

So how can we adopt the right perspective? How can change our inner state of being and become truly happy?

One way is to take pleasure in the little things.

The big things--major purchases, promotions, vacations, and the like--are far and few between, and because we anticipate them so eagerly they rarely live up to our expectations.

Little things, on the other hand, are always present in abundance. And when you learn to look at them from the right angle they become a source of joy, wonder, and satisfaction.

The angle I'm talking about is here right now. From here right now symbols and words dissolve and give way to the reality behind them. Mundane, boring, and seemingly unimportant things assume a new appearance.

Take a tree, for example. Once identified by the senses and labelled by the mind it's quickly dismissed as "a tree." But the reality behind the noun--this intricate pattern of leaves, branches, bark, and roots infused with nature's own intellect--is much harder to dismiss.

When you're time travelling--that is, when you're not present--things like trees blend into the background of your life. They become props in the mind's ongoing drama.

When you're present the label vanishes and the reality behind the label stands out. Liberated from words and concepts it's free to be what it is, which is always more awe-inspiring than our concept of it.

Put simply: when your mind is silent you can actually hear what the world has to say.

It's saying, You're not unhappy because certain things happened to you or because you lack certain things. 

You're unhappy because your thinking gets in the way of your happiness.

I know how fresh that sounds coming from a guy who's routinely accused of over-thinking, but bear with me.

There's a difference between useless, repetitive, or obsessive thought and clear, productive, and purpose-driven thought.

The thinking that gets in the way of your happiness is toxic and unconscious. It's your mind-voice left to its own devices, the untamed horse taking you for a ride.

It's the mind fixating on its own handiwork--the words, concepts, and symbols it uses to artificially divide the universe into bite-sized portions--while ignoring the reason for said handiwork: the goddamn universe itself.

Happiness isn't waiting for you in the future and it isn't rooted in some past event. Happiness is waiting for you right now behind the veil of bullshit you call "reality."

Find it in the little things first and then watch it take over your life.